UGH and YAY! is all i have to say to that. I'm so proud that he's taking steps and at the same time it's extremely sad to watch my baby quickly becoming a toddler. I'm not very fond of that word. In fact it scares me a bit. Seems like just yesterday Caleb and I sat in our special chair a couple of times a night and bonded while i fed him. Just yesterday he slept in his bassinet and just yesterday i was hearing him cry for the first time. How time flies. On the other hand, he's more independent and i don't have to hold him 24 hours a day.
When does it stop bothering me that he no longer needs me as much? I know. I know. He'll always need me but never like this first year. Now i know why mom's never let go of their sons. Sheesh! I won't do that but the temptation is huge, especially when said son wants nothing and no one but you. I WON'T. I PROMISE.
So now he's taking some steps. Another move towards becoming free of mom and dad's arms and hands. It hurts but it's the best feeling in the world knowing how far he's come. He's so healthy and thriving beautifully that i can't imagine him in any other way. I so badly want him to walk and just as badly don't want him to but i guess that's the challenge. We do what's best for our kids even if it means we're not quite ready to let go.
He's about to turn 1 in less than a month. Walking, babbling, stretching his arms out so i can hug and hold him in the mornings when he wakes up. Our goal is to always encourage the kindness in him. That part that makes him want to open-mouth kiss us out of the blue. The part that makes him walk up to his grandma because he hears her (pretend) crying. He's so beautiful and honest. I get very emotional when i think about him and what a blessing he's been to us. He'll always be my baby. The one i held for the first time almost a year ago. The one that slept between us on his first night home because neither one of us had the heart to put him anywhere else. I miss that baby but the reality is that we couldn't be happier with the boy he's becoming.
We've got so much time to enjoy him and our job as parents will never end but full independence of Caleb is around the corner, well, at least once he starts to really walk. Baby steps at the moment are not only his but also ours. Ernest and I are so in the process of learning to let go...let's be honest, me. I'm taking baby steps towards letting go. Ernest can't wait till he's walking, talking, running and all other fun activities. I cry any time he does something new because it makes me happy and it hurts at the same time. I'm rambling.
Here are a couple of pics.
